sunday, nov 26, 2000
association for the blind - 2nd floor
has anybody seen my dog?
posted by quonsar at 9:46 pm
barrel o' fun
posted by quonsar at 9:09 pm
my name is quonsar, and i'm...
i cannot deny that cold, refreshing beverage
posted by quonsar at 7:57 pm
custom printed toilet paper
posted by quonsar at 7:51 pm
butch dog food
high protein, low fat, kelp enriched pet food ads
"she's got hairy nipples, a saggy bum and breath like a turkish lavatory. god, i love that bitch."
left on the porch by shelldrake at 6:39 pm
stoned, pantsless, & masturbating
school officials shocked when hearing of arrest
"'oh, my god!' said one school employee who noted that daly was absent from class yesterday. 'he's been in the school system a long time.'"
posted by quonsar at 6:26 pm
evil science
entertainment by and for evil scientists
posted by quonsar at 6:13 pm
separated at birth?
posted by quonsar at 6:09 pm
350 lb. woman charged in attempted crushing
nearly suffocates own daughter
posted by quonsar at 5:40 pm
the president is having bad dreams
more mayhem
contains nudity. check over your shoulder.
posted by quonsar at 1:18 pm
mayhem
busta mouse move, el funkmiester
i don't know shit about this sites content, something about serial killers or something. however, by carefully mousing around this page you can create some awesome industrial funk. this amused me for almost 20 minutes.
posted by quonsar at 1:09 pm
bunny
a computer animated short film
listen closely and you can hear the 'tink' of the moth batting against the bulb.
posted by quonsar at 12:42 pm
stop that.
posted by quonsar at 12:29 pm
banana peel smoking linked to brain damage
this just in...
posted by quonsar at 11:49 am
definitive instructions for smoking banana peels
since we mentioned losers...
posted by quonsar at 11:34 am
losers dot org
losers. you know them...
"you've seen them on the street. you've seen them in the office. you've seen them at family reunions. now they're on the internet..."
posted by quonsar at 11:11 am
what is a godly woman?
from the religious wacko web excrement department
posted by quonsar at 11:02 am
saturday, nov 25, 2000
voting for dummies
posted by quonsar at 10:56 pm
angry little asian girl
i don't see the appeal.
posted by quonsar at 10:35 pm
nuclear blast mapper
mapping the zone of destruction
launched by shelldrake at 10:27 pm
deep-fried turkey
juicy turkey, crispy skin
to do it right, you'll need a cajun injector.
posted by quonsar at 12:24 pm
my grandma, what big testicles you have
bizarre foreign tv ads
this japanese ad features little red riding hood dancing in the forest with a rabbit, a bear, a wolf, and a deer. they are interrupted by a dancing racoon with giant swinging testicles. shrug.
posted by quonsar at 12:19 pm
slap hillary dot com
a public service for the terminally frustrated
and those who are just plain mean-spirited. :-)
posted by quonsar at 12:08 pm
don't ask, don't tell?
posted by quonsar at 11:52 am
yo quiero taco bell
posted by quonsar at 1:50 am
friday, nov 24, 2000
woman accidentally glues eye shut
mistakes superglue for eyedrops
posted by quonsar at 10:48 pm
to grandmother's house we go
posted by quonsar at 10:35 pm
mindpixel: digital mind modeling project
help create the mindpixel corpus
"a mindpixel is a binary statement of consensus fact such as "water is wet" or "it is difficult to swim with ski pants on."
posted by quonsar at 10:31 pm
ijustgotfired.com
your_name@ijustgotfired.com
email and business cards for dot com refugees.
posted by quonsar at 9:54 pm
soar: searchable online archive of recipes
over 70,000 recipes currently indexed
and some food humor too.
posted by quonsar at 9:31 pm
meet monty cantsin
shrug. reload. shrug.
posted by quonsar at 8:55 pm
stfhofonfls-kjam
well, i'm glad to hear it
when headlines self destruct. mirror
posted by quonsar at 6:54 pm
sewer cam spots pot flush
a little short of must-see tv
"a camera lowered last month into a sewer on a routine maintenance check spotted marijuana plants being flushed into the line."
posted by quonsar at 5:19 pm
best toilets dot com
the place to go before you have to
posted by quonsar at 9:53 am
thursday, nov 23, 2000
the electric amish
three men, three beards, and no power
"the electric amish may be visiting a barn near you! be sure to lock up the sheep that night!"
posted by quonsar at 11:33 pm
death dot com
coming soon - online coverage of executions
posted by quonsar at 11:06 pm
http://pota.to
posted by quonsar at 10:15 pm
robot vacuum cleaner
equipped with a real vacuum cleaner
"at the end of the arm, there is a tactile system, robust and efficient."
homemakers appreciate household appliances with robust, efficient tactile systems.
posted by quonsar at 9:20 pm
starch can falling off the ironing board?
starch can holder dot com
"the distraction of having to stop ironing and retrieve the wayward starch can is extremely frustrating."
posted by quonsar at 8:57 pm
fart waffles
more wonders of the web
posted by quonsar at 7:54 pm
natures turkey®
electric sheep thanksgiving special
"we custom-ordered our own nature's turkey® right then and there. we got us a 30-pound bird, with 10% salmon genes, 5% sweet potato and 0.005% cranberry, fed on a special formula of sage, oregano, and st. john's wort."
posted by quonsar at 9:10 am
slapping a restraining order on mr. bush
enough is enough!
"for too long the innocent children of america have had to endure the unsolicited advances of shameless office seekers. children all over the country are being stalked, slobbered over, patted, poked, prodded, shaken, squeezed and tossed into the air by complete strangers whose only interest is a convenient photo-op."
posted by quonsar at 8:03 am
crackerhead mood chooser
it was smiling when i got there
probably been scoping out ascii babes.
posted by quonsar at 7:42 am
wednesday, nov 22, 2000
designer vaginas
no more 'flippy-floppy' feeling
"high above sunset boulevard, in matlock's plush, 5,000-square-foot office, vaginas are being redesigned, labia modified, vulvae reconfigured."
posted by quonsar at 11:30 pm
orthopedics for poultry made easy for beginners
order the video!
peachicks got crooked toes and straddle legs? make your own chick shoes and hobble braces.
posted by quonsar at 10:30 pm
turkey testicles
"they taste something like a mushroom"
posted by quonsar at 9:44 pm
i own mars
act now! only 6943 acres left!
i also leased a piece of the moon, in case i ever vacation there.
posted by quonsar at 9:23 pm
let's mow!
miss your mower?
there's an official british lawn mower racing site, whatsthebest-lawnmower.com, a robot lawn mower and (finally) death of a lawn mower. enjoy. i'm off to fire up the friggin' snowblower.
posted by quonsar at 8:42 pm
brain transplantation
forever young
"moving your identity into a new, younger human body will make you young again!"
posted by quonsar at 8:21 pm
counting sheep
posted by quonsar at 8:09 pm
we don't need no stinkin' content
posted by quonsar at 7:23 pm
tuesday, nov 21, 2000
conversatron dot com
"we're losing $14 million a week."
seriously funny shit.
posted by quonsar at 8:41 pm
the spinning head of g gordon liddy
you could attempt to run. but where would you go?
posted by quonsar at 8:26 pm
bender's wet dream
posted by quonsar at 8:14 pm
illustrated guide to breaking your computer
step-by-step guide to satisfying computer destruction
opinions on proper methodology may vary.
posted by quonsar at 8:00 pm
monday, nov 20, 2000
lost in the noise
and yet, somehow still managing to add to it.
hey. that was my line.
posted by quonsar at 9:48 pm
train to be a shepherd
posted by quonsar at 9:40 pm
410 user disemboweled
server error messages from hell
no! wait! i'm not ready!
posted by quonsar at 9:07 pm
national toilet association
they can have my toilet when they pry it off my cold dead ass
"by taking away our god given right to the toilet of our choice, congress has seen to it that we can no longer purchase toilets that flush properly."
wasn't this the plot for a 'king of the hill' episode a while back?
posted by quonsar at 8:34 pm
encyclopedia of unusual sex practices
from the mildly kinky to the truly bizarre
"a first-class, reference source for those seeking to understand the range of human sexual expression"
or those looking for some cheap giggles.
posted by quonsar at 7:53 pm